Damn. It's starting to happen again.
I'm getting those thoughts that I've had, occasionally, on and off, over the years:
"I should just pack all this shit up and go find some shack in the mountains for $250 a month. Live simply, live lightly. Disconnect from society and re-connect with my artistic side. Be able to spend my time writing and getting my ideas out on paper, at least the better ones, before I die. Not have to deal with the insanity of trying to 'get ahead' (to sink less speedily, actually) in some soul-numbing 9-to-5 job.
"If not now, when? Why shouldn't I do this? I've never had a 'career'... I don't really want to pretend to get one now... Society on the whole is going down the drain anyway... I could spend more quality time with my daughter...and possibly pen something worthwhile, accidentally, somehow...
"If I keep doing what I've always been doing, I'm just going to keep getting the same results, right? Am I really going to live my whole life without exploring some of the edges of the box I've put myself in? Without making a real attempt, at least once, to break out? That's one of the saddest thoughts I can conjure up.
"Is it too much to wish for? Do I have so little confidence in my gifts, my abilities, my skills, that I'll just remain paralyzed, one more robotic zombie in the giant crazy rat race that is modern society? Am I so afraid of failing in such an experiment that I'd rather just sit and numbly watch myself rot?"
Tough questions on a Tuesday night.
~G
Gimme a Call!
(It"s ALL) About Me
- Greg Pate
- Redding, CA, United States
- A guy trying valiantly to catch up to the e-world. And failing, mostly!
Some Favorite Websites & Blogs
My All-Time Favorite Comedies
- Airplane
- Better Off Dead
- Dr. Strangelove
- Drowning Mona
- Fatal Instinct
- Hot Shots
- Mafia
- Monty Python's Search for the Holy Grail
- Naked Gun
- Napoleon Dynamite
- Spinal Tap
- Young Frankenstein
- Zoolander
4 comments:
My friend, it is easier than you think, and it feels even better than you anticipate. Here, borrow my favorite quote, from one of my favorite writers, Anais Nin: "There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." You have your feet on the ground. You can't fall off the ground. Do what you love.
Is it KJB? I think about these same things every single day. I makes steps toward the change - then remember the mound of bills I mistakenly got myself wrapped up in and sigh, go to bed and stare at the ceiling for hours. And I'd trying to do what I love, but I can't seem to convince the children that it is the best possible course. Uhg.
Also remember that the greatest creation you can ever produce already exists. She is rather cute and calls you "poppa". The greatest thing you can give the world we live in is a future.
I like your new greg's plate picture. You should have spam, spam, spam, baked beans, and spam on it.
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